Minder For Appearance
Problems:
Miss Maya, I am a 24 year old woman, about to graduate college. It's been years was not happy with the condition of the body and my appearance is not attractive. Frankly, I think I'm ugly, I mean physically, not pretty interesting as others. Clothing styles, make-up or whatever hairstyle try-try, it does not find a match, it all makes me appear more strange and sad that I hate myself. I felt my body was too skinny and shapeless, not to mention the color of my skin are dark and dull, wear whatever color is so dead and not matching. Hair too thick and stiff to be less manageable. The most miserable, I felt my face was not pretty, but mommy and daddy arguably quite beautiful / handsome. Although he felt guilty for not appreciate a gift from God, can not I avoid I often envied by other women who can look like a model, white and clean, wearing what looked confident and flexible so it can be a lot of friends. As for me, always feel confident not so lazy socializing. I've followed the skin care in specialized clinics, formerly also pretty diligent to the spa for a treatment that is quite expensive. Now I've been lazy and stopped in the middle of the road because money runs out and no results.
It was really stressful ya, I'm not a spirit for life, even I'm actually very lazy college and hang out. 's My favorite place is my bedroom, where I can reflect and cry as much. I want to get out of this problem, because I know it's not healthy. But how do ya?
***************
Answer:
Dear Rosa, problem rooted in the perception and subjective evaluation are negative about yourself, which makes you feel physically look unattractive and also makes you think that other people think so. In fact, it is not necessarily correct tablets.
Recognizing the shortcomings themselves to a certain extent is good, so you do not become arrogant and narcissistic (self adore). Pain is not satisfied with appearance can also be a booster for the diligent care of yourself, exercise, attention to diet and nutrition, as well as add insight into fashion trends and makeup in order to appear more attractive. However, all that is finite, must not become an obsession that controls your mind, makes you feel very uncomfortable (even hate!) With yourself, you're stressed and consequently fell into depression.
Actually, there is a special term for the extreme discomfort of the performances themselves, namely body dysmorphic disorder. On the condition or disorder is considered pathological, the sufferer feeling very disturbed even hate her physical appearance is believed poor, unattractive, so he was depressed, stress and depression that interferes with their ability to function healthily in his life (not thinking, working, socializing or run his roles in the family and society). Of course it was very miserable and impossible to enjoy living in such conditions. In fact, the reality is usually not as bad as the people think / feel.
* I would like to ask you to think back about the things that have you believe:
Is it true that you are not attractive?
What is the evidence?
Any losses arising from the belief that? (Think of how many things you did not do or try to avoid you because you think ugly)
Is it true that nothing can be done to improve the situation?
There are some basic things you need to reflect back and biodiversity:
Any attempt you do to change your appearance will not be fruitful result if you do not change or remove your negative first self-assessment. Will be worth it all nice clothes, makeup and hair styles that you use the latest to cover the 'flaw', if deep in your heart you still believe that 'all was to no avail, it will not work to make myself more attractive'.
Physical beauty is not everything and that is totally relative. Kindness, sincerity and humility, manners and sensibility themselves are other things that will give you more value in the eyes of others and it is more universal.
Next, try the following:
Build a more positive self-concept and try to be more objective in judging yourself. Recognize talents-talents and try to continue to develop a positive activity even fruitful achievements to be proud of, so you do not worry about physical appearance glued.
Every individual is unique, so even physically. Rather than focus on the shortcomings and looking for body parts that feel perfect, try to find the parts of the face or your physical unique characteristic or feature characters yourself. Is that great or slanted eyes, small nose, wide lips, but has a charming smile lines, dimples in cheeks, brown skin color is sweet, and so forth. You are unique without needing pretty perfect!
Control yourself to not constantly in the mirror, because it will only add to your worries and make you more and more fixated on the "shortcomings" you.
Put yourself to the family and those closest (parents, siblings, cousins, friends, etc..) And try to make friends with the people around you (could classmates, neighbors, cousins, etc.), because they are a source of emotional support precious. Get rid of fear heckled, insulted, or considered less, because it will only make you more and more shut down and avoid promiscuity. Try to be more open, they make the vent to talk about negative emotions you feel and listen to the advice that can foster self-esteem.
If the problem is deemed too severe to overcome yourself, seek professional help with a visit to a psychologist or psychiatrist who practices in your city. You can undergo therapy to transform yourself into a more positive assessment, but be careful if you decide to use antidepressants to treat depression. Understand completely all side effects that may be caused by the use of a long and continuous.
Indeed, to foster self-confidence and develop a more positive self-concept and the process takes time that is not easy. However, try to survive and be patient, instill a strong desire within you to be more loving and live comfortably with yourself. Believe Rosa.
Maya Harry, Psi
Sources: Indonesian Women
Problems:
Miss Maya, I am a 24 year old woman, about to graduate college. It's been years was not happy with the condition of the body and my appearance is not attractive. Frankly, I think I'm ugly, I mean physically, not pretty interesting as others. Clothing styles, make-up or whatever hairstyle try-try, it does not find a match, it all makes me appear more strange and sad that I hate myself. I felt my body was too skinny and shapeless, not to mention the color of my skin are dark and dull, wear whatever color is so dead and not matching. Hair too thick and stiff to be less manageable. The most miserable, I felt my face was not pretty, but mommy and daddy arguably quite beautiful / handsome. Although he felt guilty for not appreciate a gift from God, can not I avoid I often envied by other women who can look like a model, white and clean, wearing what looked confident and flexible so it can be a lot of friends. As for me, always feel confident not so lazy socializing. I've followed the skin care in specialized clinics, formerly also pretty diligent to the spa for a treatment that is quite expensive. Now I've been lazy and stopped in the middle of the road because money runs out and no results.
It was really stressful ya, I'm not a spirit for life, even I'm actually very lazy college and hang out. 's My favorite place is my bedroom, where I can reflect and cry as much. I want to get out of this problem, because I know it's not healthy. But how do ya?
***************
Answer:
Dear Rosa, problem rooted in the perception and subjective evaluation are negative about yourself, which makes you feel physically look unattractive and also makes you think that other people think so. In fact, it is not necessarily correct tablets.
Recognizing the shortcomings themselves to a certain extent is good, so you do not become arrogant and narcissistic (self adore). Pain is not satisfied with appearance can also be a booster for the diligent care of yourself, exercise, attention to diet and nutrition, as well as add insight into fashion trends and makeup in order to appear more attractive. However, all that is finite, must not become an obsession that controls your mind, makes you feel very uncomfortable (even hate!) With yourself, you're stressed and consequently fell into depression.
Actually, there is a special term for the extreme discomfort of the performances themselves, namely body dysmorphic disorder. On the condition or disorder is considered pathological, the sufferer feeling very disturbed even hate her physical appearance is believed poor, unattractive, so he was depressed, stress and depression that interferes with their ability to function healthily in his life (not thinking, working, socializing or run his roles in the family and society). Of course it was very miserable and impossible to enjoy living in such conditions. In fact, the reality is usually not as bad as the people think / feel.
* I would like to ask you to think back about the things that have you believe:
Is it true that you are not attractive?
What is the evidence?
Any losses arising from the belief that? (Think of how many things you did not do or try to avoid you because you think ugly)
Is it true that nothing can be done to improve the situation?
There are some basic things you need to reflect back and biodiversity:
Any attempt you do to change your appearance will not be fruitful result if you do not change or remove your negative first self-assessment. Will be worth it all nice clothes, makeup and hair styles that you use the latest to cover the 'flaw', if deep in your heart you still believe that 'all was to no avail, it will not work to make myself more attractive'.
Physical beauty is not everything and that is totally relative. Kindness, sincerity and humility, manners and sensibility themselves are other things that will give you more value in the eyes of others and it is more universal.
Next, try the following:
Build a more positive self-concept and try to be more objective in judging yourself. Recognize talents-talents and try to continue to develop a positive activity even fruitful achievements to be proud of, so you do not worry about physical appearance glued.
Every individual is unique, so even physically. Rather than focus on the shortcomings and looking for body parts that feel perfect, try to find the parts of the face or your physical unique characteristic or feature characters yourself. Is that great or slanted eyes, small nose, wide lips, but has a charming smile lines, dimples in cheeks, brown skin color is sweet, and so forth. You are unique without needing pretty perfect!
Control yourself to not constantly in the mirror, because it will only add to your worries and make you more and more fixated on the "shortcomings" you.
Put yourself to the family and those closest (parents, siblings, cousins, friends, etc..) And try to make friends with the people around you (could classmates, neighbors, cousins, etc.), because they are a source of emotional support precious. Get rid of fear heckled, insulted, or considered less, because it will only make you more and more shut down and avoid promiscuity. Try to be more open, they make the vent to talk about negative emotions you feel and listen to the advice that can foster self-esteem.
If the problem is deemed too severe to overcome yourself, seek professional help with a visit to a psychologist or psychiatrist who practices in your city. You can undergo therapy to transform yourself into a more positive assessment, but be careful if you decide to use antidepressants to treat depression. Understand completely all side effects that may be caused by the use of a long and continuous.
Indeed, to foster self-confidence and develop a more positive self-concept and the process takes time that is not easy. However, try to survive and be patient, instill a strong desire within you to be more loving and live comfortably with yourself. Believe Rosa.
Maya Harry, Psi
Sources: Indonesian Women
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